LINE NOISE News from Chez Diesel 23 July 1998 It's getting so you can't move for bloody Traders these days - which is bad news for me because most of them are more interesting in working than in drinking. The latest additions are Omi and Bullfrog, who made it within a couple of days of each other. Poor Omi got into a terrible mess looking for the Guildmaster. He had been frigged up almost every level of the game - he even borrowed money to get his networth high enough to make Trader - and he really didn't have a thorough enough knowledge of the game to cope. Having been visited by the messenger, where did he choose to start his search? The Maze! He soon regretted his choice as he became hopelessly lost, blundering around for some time. Despite his pleas for help, no-one would guide him out - hard-hearted lot! Eventually he managed (by pure luck) to escape and found The Man soon after. But it is beyond belief that someone could get as high up the ranks without having thoroughly mapped the game. Another good reason NOT to give loans to players who aren't experienced enough to handle their new rank. (B&Z take note!) By contrast Bullfrog had no problems finding the GM, although he also needed a loan to make up his networth. He and Omi are now discovering that the wonderful world of Traderhood ain't all it's cracked up to be. So just for you two, here are some vital facts you have to know in order to make a success of Trading: THE FIVE LAWS OF TRADING 1) If a bad line is going to forcibly eject you, it will NEVER be when you have just emptied your hold. 2) Whatever you've got - The exchange isn't buying that! 3) Even if the exchange is buying nothing, it won't sell you anything either. 4) Stockpiling a valuable commodity guarantees that no exchange will want it. 5) If you have to leave the game in a hurry you will always have a large cargo - and there will be no space in your warehouse. -=*=- As I predicted, there has been much movement in the Conclave. In came Samantha and out dropped Pegasus. Everyone's favourite winged horse wasn't standing for this and staged a remarkable comeback, knocking Zugger out. Pegs and Sam are currently fighting it out for third place - rumour has it she is aiming to be Leader of the Pack so watch out Liney! Placings as I write are: Linebacker Toranaga Samantha Pegasus Pugwash Cloudbase but it could have already changed! All those worried about not being intelligent enough to survive when ship fighting is introduced in a few weeks (it's the level of computer in your ship which will count in a fight, and the brainier you are the better computer you can use) can breathe a huge sigh of relief. Soon you will be able to buy extra stats in any of the four categories. First to be available will be Dexterity, which you will obtain by giving a new object to an existing mobile. The rest will follow shortly - Muscles will be obtained from the Sports Complex on the Moon; Braincells from a new mobile deep in the Mercury caves; and Stamina from the Hospital. There's a catch, of course... each of these will be accompanied by a puzzle, and they will all contain some element of risk. They aren't gonna be cheap, either! At 1 meg a point, only the stinking rich upper echelons will be able to boost their vital statistics. But since to advance to Merchant (the next rank after Trader) you are going to have to boost your stats to a total of 200 you are each going to have to spend 40 million on self improvements. But that is no excuse to stop drinking! Another new feature - ships are going to wear out. Every couple of hundred Galactic Thingie Units will see 1 point drop off the ships stats. Failing to get a service will reduce the efficiency of the ship, making it the Galactic equivalent of a Skoda, until eventually it will fall apart around you. Should you prefer to keep your ship in pristine condition, you can have repairs carried out in the repair shops on most planets. For a price, of course! This will only affect Adventurers and above - so it's another reason to think twice before borrowing money to frig yourself up! One final new command... will give you a list of the ranks in Fed for your sex. Good old Captain Dave has uploaded Fed's first tune. The Pugwash theme (especially for the Sexiest Trader) is in Fedder. Maybe everyone should choose a tune to match their persona and find a friendly coder to do the technical bits. If you have any ideas of tunes that fit certain players, let me know. Even without fighting, Fed is becoming a violent game. Assassinations are on the increase, with the TDX being the favoured method. It is relatively easy to sucker a new Commander in this way, but some people have fallen for it even when they've been playing the game for some time. Poor Tc was fooled into thinking it was safe to drop the Tdx onto a carpetted surface, and suffered the consequences. He really should have known better! Don't forget to mail me with any news, gossip or scandal you have about Fed. Especially scandal - nothing is too sordid for Line Noise! .