LINE NOISE News from Chez Diesel 3 April, 1989 NO MORE GM'S Where have all the Guildthings gone? Just as we'd got used to seeing 'Guild Master Hawk' and 'Guild Maitresse Pugwash' (or Guild Matress, as the disrespectful whispered behind her back) on the list, they are no more! What is the mystery of the disappearing GMs? No mystery - they've been promoted! Yes, Fed has its first Explorers. Both Hawk and Pugwash turned into Explorers - but unfortunately the net crashed so the notices posted in review were wiped out! This is the first time there has been a 'gap' in the ranks. No-one else has yet been able to solve the fiendish GM puzzle, so the position is currently vacant. Explorer is the rank at which players can write their own planets. The 'tools' for the basic location editing will be available in about two weeks; the rest a few weeks after that. Hazed-by-Alcohol (publishers of the most popular book in the known (and possibly unknown) universe, the Idiot's Guide to Federation II (mbx DIESEL for details of how to purchase your very own copy)) have been commissioned by Our Illustrious Leader to write the instructions on Planetary Construction. This will eventually form a new section of the Guide. Basic details about designing your very own world will be uploaded in the next few days; information on running the planetary economy will have to wait until they can actually try it out for themselves! (And Bella has decided how it will work...) The four remaining wanna-be-GMs have been blowing up the Asteroid with monotonous regularity but none of them have yet managed to escape with their lives - and in the process they have provided much entertainment for their ex-colleagues, now able to spy on them. Omi has made the most attempts at the puzzle, and kept running out of insurance money - his premium is approaching 2 meg. He came very close to a nasty end when he was running around with no insurance and a wimpish little ship; that bastard Craptosporywhatsit chose that moment to pick a fight with him. It was pure luck that let Omi escape with his life (it couldn't have been mercy on Crapto's part; he doesn't know the meaning of the word!) Following Aunty Pugwash's advice, Junior has now given up attempting the puzzle until he has made himself a comfortable bank-balance to fall back on. Zugger has provided the most entertainment for spyers. He has attempted the puzzle three times with no success, but it was when he tried to help Xaviour by killing the satellites that he proved totally incompetent. He managed to die twice without spotting them, by accidentally blundering back out of Hilly Space on an empty stomach, and when he finally found a satellite he was no match for its powerful armaments. Notching up three deaths in one night must be a record - and not one people will be eager to break! Spacehound seems to have given up on the puzzle for the time being; he has been co- operating with Zugger and Xaviour but seems unwilling to risk his own life to have a go. Or maybe they just won't let him get a look in! Xaviour has declared his intention to stop playing Fed, but is determined to solve the puzzle first - he won't give Bella the satisfaction of thinking that his failure has driven to to his death. This should leave plenty of time for people to try and talk him out of it! The question is, if he does top himself, who will he leave his money to? (If he has any left after his repeated deaths at the GM puzzle!) Will he dish it out amongst the deserving Poor People, or will he leave the lot to one of the poor struggling JPs? Omi has hopes in this direction - he has been displaying extremely ghoulish tendences, encouraging Xaviour to suicide before his money is spent! But other players have been urging Xav not to do it. Who will prove the most persuasive? We shall have to wait and see.