Inside Scoop page 1

IT'S A WONDERFUL WORLD... BUT ONLY IN MY HEAD

by Jezz

So you have this great idea for your planet but you aren't sure how to write it so that others will be able to share your vision. It's one thing to know what your planet looks like, but quite another to be able to get that idea across to visitors as they explore. If you're building your very first planet, it's a good idea to start designing while you are a factory owner as it tends to take longer than one would think to bring a whole planet to completion.

I don't want to write about how the workbench works as the accompanying manual provides all of that information in great detail. This article is about how you could transfer the ideas you have into a form that is pleasing or interesting to others. There are no rules about what form your planet takes as long as you have the required locations, like one exchange, one landing pad etc. If you take a look around some of the player planets you'll see different styles and forms everywhere.

Here are a few hints and strategies for writing a planet that will appeal to others as well as yourself.

Be original with your theme. While imitation might be the most sincere form of flattery, it's not such a great idea to do a theme that somebody else has already done well. Pick a theme you know something about or do some research to increase your knowledge. If you decide to turn your planet into a space-faring version of The Titanic, for example, it would be a good idea to research the original vessel, know the basic layout and name the various rooms in accordance with the original. Put in some characters that fit your theme so that people don't think they are on the Marie Celeste instead of the Titanic.

Map your rooms so that they make sense given the distance and direction. Some planets like Apollo and Drunk form a picture with the map. Apollo looks like a rocket and much of the map is a museum tour of the various Apollo missions. Drunk forms the shape of a martini glass when you look at the map. Those planet owners used their planet name and map configuration to tell you something about the planet before you've even read the location descriptions. If you decide to use a particular shape for your planet map you still should make sure that the progression from room to room is logical in some way.

Let's say you've got your planet name and basic theme and you're starting to write the locations that will make your vision a reality.

You could start with some paper and a pencil and think about how you want your location to "feel" to explorers. Is it creepy, warm and fuzzy, funny, full of danger, quaint, peaceful? The list of possibilities is endless. Jot down the feeling that you want to evoke with your description. Now comes the hard part. Turn off the TV, close your eyes and picture the place you are going to write about. Imagine it in as much detail as possible and put yourself inside the picture. For this example I'm going to use a street scene. When you stand on the street and look around, what are the buildings like? Are they white painted cottages with red tiled roofs or maybe towering skyscrapers? What does the road feel like? Is it quiet or bustling with activity? What's the weather like? Is there a particular smell about the place? Where could you move to from here? If you can really visualize the place you are standing well, you've probably got more information than you can easily convey in 1000 characters. So on the paper jot down the features that really stand out in the scene, eg quaint cottages, smell of bread from the bakers (east), sweet shop (west) children, cobbled street (north/church, south/LP), sunshine.

Now you need to translate those images into words that others will read and understand. If you try to include everything, your description could become too long and cumbersome. Remember that if you pick the right things to describe, the imagination of the reader will fill in the blanks. If you have a lot of information to convey you will have to use that oh so flexible tool, the English language, to get all your points across in a concise manner. I'll try to give you an example..

First Draft:

Church Street
You're standing on an old fashioned cobbled street. Quaint cottages with thatched roofs and white painted walls are on either side of the street. There is a baker's shop to the east and you can smell the scent of fresh baked bread from that direction. It makes you feel quite hungry. To the west there is a sweet shop and there are children standing outside it looking through the windows and wishing they could buy a treat. The street is busy with people shopping and chatting to each other. The weather is warm and sunny. To the north you can see a church with a tall spire in the distance. To the south is the landing pad where shuttles take off and land continuously. You can just hear the sound of the shuttle engines above the chatter of people.

Second draft:

Church Street
The delicious scent of fresh baked bread wafts onto this quaint cobbled street from a thatch roofed baker's shop to the east. To the west, wide-eyed children press their noses to the bottle-glass windows of a sweet shop. Warm sunlight reflects from the spire of the church at the north end of the street. The drone of shuttle engines from the south is barely heard above the chatter of busy shoppers.

The second draft conveys much the same image as the first but uses a lot less words. One thing that the second draft doesn't do is tell the reader how to feel. You notice that in the first draft were the words "It makes you feel quite hungry.". A good description will encourage the reader to feel a certain way without ever saying "You feel...". Openly telling a reader how to feel about your description is akin to a comedian following each joke with "That was funny. You should laugh now."

Now that you have your description you need to make sure the directions match the actual map directions and SPELL CHECK it. If you have read the workbench manual you'll know that it's not a great idea to copy paste from a word processor program that adds fancy characters like the curly quotation marks. However there's nothing wrong with copying and pasting from the location editor to a word processor program so that you can check for errors, and correcting the workbench file if the word processor finds any spelling mistakes. Your spelling and grammar will have a major impact on how much an explorer enjoys visiting your planet.

Use the no-exit messages to your advantage. You can convey a considerable amount of information with a no-exit message. They could be funny or even disturbing. If you've ever walked in the wrong direction in the Ainokea exchange you'll know what I mean.

Finally, proof read what you've created, then proof read it again. Ask a friend to read it. The human mind tends to read what it expects to see, so a fresh pair of eyes will likely find things you have missed even if you've read it a dozen times. Most importantly, have fun with it.

I'm sure if you talk to various planet builders they would each come up with a different strategy for good planet writing. Ask a few how they go about it and find a way that suits you. The possibilities are limited only by your imagination. That's part of what makes Fed the best game going.

Happy Planet Building!

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