The weekly newsletter for Fed2 by ibgames

EARTHDATE: May 10, 2009

Fed Funnies page 1


TOP TEN REASONS THAT COMMANDERS CURSE

by Jezz

Poor Commander Navassa was having a little trouble with her NavComp this week. Not only that, but she forgot her comm unit was turned on when the apparent string of curses escaped her lips (or equivalent)! Fortunately for us, the comm unit was buried under maps and contracts and all that other stuff that commanders regularly carry around with them, and all we heard was muffled, agonized but indistinct mutterings. Not being one to pass up a chance to take advantage of someone else's abject misery, I thought it might be just the time to ask for a list of the...

Top Ten Reasons Commanders Curse.

10. "Hey! Someone stole my AC job!"
9. They haven't figured out the PIN for the ATM behind the sun.
8. They ask one question on comms and get 10 answers!
7. "The Idiot's guide recommended Diesel's as a hangout, but it didn't warn me about Arlene!"
6. "Customs! Never there when you need 'em, then there's six in one trip!"
5. "I could have sworn I parked the ship here!"
4. The Lattice.
3. "I got a great contract from Kingdom to Asylum... how do I get there?"
2. Someone told them they would get cheaper insurance if they bought it from the secret gecko on Titan.

And of course, the number one curse-worthy thing for every commander is...

1. "You want HOW MUCH for 20 tons of fuel in space????"


Thanks go out to Dingbat, Caesar, Cragon, Xorna, Zard's secret gecko, and Navassa. I do hope her day got better after that. And if it's any consolation to those poor commanders out there... if you think those are bad, just wait till you accidentally reset your planetary exchange to zero!


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