Inside Scoop page 1

THE JOY OF FED MARRIAGE

by Jezz

Dear Fedizens

Some of you know that I've been planning my next trans-Atlantic move for a while. I'll be leaving behind my beloved Zardoz, at least for a little while. Of course I will try to get back to Fed as soon as possible but it's all up in the air right now. As this is going to be my last article for at least a few weeks, I wanted to share some of my thoughts on what I consider to be the very best part of my Fed life, my fed-marriage to Zardoz.

Sometimes in online environments two people just seem to click. That was Zardoz and I. I wasn't all that sure about being married at first. I thought perhaps it would get old and stale. You've all seen Fed relationships come and go, I'm sure. I didn't want to end up being unhappy with my role-play choices. In a tight knit community, even a fantasy one like Fed, relationship breakups often spill over to affect those around the parties involved, and strife and drama are not my favorite things. But as time went by it just seemed like we were two space travelers made for each other. I've never regretted marrying Zardoz for a single moment of my Fed life. He has been supportive, trustworthy and caring and I hope that I've been that for him.

When news first leaked out that Zardoz and I were a couple, there were a couple of nay-sayers around. One in particular tried to convince me that Zardoz had actually done away with his first wife and had put her body in a matter-transformer or jettisoned it into the Sun. Luckily for me, I didn't listen. We were married on Earth shortly after I had my embarrassing accident on Titan and Hazed's droid unwittingly caught the bouquet by virtue of showing up just at the moment I flung it.

But all the mushy stuff aside, I wanted to talk about what really makes a Fed relationship work.

Firstly it's honesty and communication. The couple has to decide up front what is expected of each of them. Does one player object to the other player having alts in other relationships? If they do then you need to find out before you walk down to the registry office. Then once the acceptable behavior has been discussed and agreed upon, both parties have to stick to it. Unlike Real Life, we in Fed have the ability to create a little clone of ourselves so that we can experience life from another angle. But generally speaking, those clones will eventually be recognized. It would take an exceptional role player to pull off a double life and not be found out in fairly short order. I'm not saying don't have alternate relationship or flirtations in Fed. I'm saying agree on whether that is ok for you and don't break your own rules.

Fed relationships still rely on trust, just as real life ones do. But this trust is all about what happens in Fed and not what happens outside of it. Remember that the person your character loves is a role-played character. While there are probably some strong similarities between the character and the player, the image we build up in our minds is likely too hard for any person to live up to in real life. I, for instance, would be terribly disappointed if I met Zardoz in real life and he didn't have a dyslexic twin and a fuzzy Ookla sidekick! So my advice is... keep it in Fed. That's the medium in which the relationship can flourish and that's where it started. Role play to your hearts content and try not to forget that there is a real person with real feelings on the other end, but that that person has a life outside of Fed that doesn't include you. If the relationship spills over to real life then all sorts of havoc can ensue. Zard and I have never had that problem, but I know it does happen. If you're looking to get hooked up in real life then Fed really isn't the place to do it.

To my Zardoz whom I love more than one RP character could ever love another, don't give up on me. Keep an eye on The Rift for me and try not to send too many newbies to Titan for insurance.

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