Official News page 5

REAL LIFE NEWS: EXPLOSIVES ARE NEW FOOD FOR SHEEP

by Hazed

Those crazy scientists and their wacky plans - what will they come up with next? Well, one group are doing something very peculiar: they are feeding TNT to sheep.

This immediately conjures up images of exploding sheep with cooked mutton going in one direction and singed wool in another, but no, that's not what is happening. It seems that the sheep digestive system is capable of dealing with all kinds of substances that would cause problems to other species. Sheep guts can break down TNT into harmless residues, without causing any ill effects to the woolly creatures.

This comes from a discovery by Professor A Morrie Craig, who discovered that sheep can eat a poisonous plant called the tansy ragwort with no ill-effect. This is fatal to cattle and horses and causes a lot of problems, but sheep can munch away without any trouble because they are protected by bacteria that live in their digestive tract.

So why would you want sheep to dispose of TNT? Well, the US military has large tracts of land which is polluted by the stuff, thanks to firing artillery shells into the ground or manufacturing them nearby. While this TNT is not about to blow up, it could be toxic to humans if it managed to get into food or water supplies, so the land cannot be sold off and re-used for farming in its current state.

Prof Craig has therefore come up with a plan: plant the ground with grasses that will draw out the explosives, then let slip the sheep of war to guzzle up the TNT in the green stuff. He reckons it would take about three years to reduce the concentration in the soil to safe levels.

Meanwhile, the sheep would still be safe to eat because the toxic TNT can't enter their system, but is broken down on entry.

And if you want a way to identify the sheep that have been eating TNT and distinguish them from other sheep, it's easy: use a baaaaaah code!

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